Mom guilt. One of the biggest challenges I’ve faced as a mom. It’s shaming, harming, and if you’re a busy mom like me, can even be damaging to your career. I also think it’s one of the biggest traits that differentiates mothers from fathers.

Whether you’re holding yourself back from taking the job in fear of missing out on your child’s life or cancel a business meeting because you’re afraid you won’t make it in time to put your child to bed, mom guild holds a lot of us back.

While there’s no magic pill to eliminate mom guilt, there are certain practices you can implement into your life to reduce it. Below are my top four tips to combating mom guilt.

Talk to your kid(s)

It’s astonishing how much effort we put into parenting and still manage to ignore our own children’s thoughts. As parents, we go to outside help for support with our parenting skills, but why are we so afraid of leaning into our own kids’ opinions?

I’m constantly amazed at how my six-year-old daughter understands my outside responsibilities. Whether it’s an event, meeting, or work deadlines that’ll keep me out of the house longer than usual, I make sure to mention it to her. Her support empowers me to go on with my day without feeling guilty.

Focus on quality over quantity

Have you ever realized the more time you have with someone the less you cherish the time? This is true with any relationship, but more so with that of parents and their children.

Understanding the limited time you have with your family adds extra value to that time. Whether it’s your work-free weekends or paid vacations, making the most out of your time can help you fight mom-guilt.

Build a support system

Whether it’s your partner, family members, or the mom group at your child’s school, a support system is crucial to ensure you’re communicating your feelings. There’s nothing worse than bottling in your distress, so having someone to vent and find comfort in can ensure success.

You’ll be surprised how many people are dealing with the same issues you are. By opening up and having someone to confide in, you’ll understand that mom-guilt is not exclusive to you and therefore don’t have to go at it alone. Find your tribe and make sure to reach out in times of need.

Create your own expectations

With social media now playing such a big role in our daily lives, it’s easy to fall into a comparison hole and live by other’s definitions of happiness. I realized that in order to find fulfillment and long-term happiness, I’d have to set expectations of what those words meant to me.

Whether it’s undivided attention on the weekends, or not checking your work email after 6 p.m., your set of rules and expectations can help guide you to a guilt-free life that you and your family can truly enjoy.