You make yourself irresistible to him. You smile, you’re a great listener and you’re positive, encouraging, affectionate, and playful. You even share the same interests. Yet, he’s starting to distance himself from you. He doesn’t call or text you. All the sudden he’s gone silent. What went wrong? Your brain floods you with one answered question after another. Has he met someone else? Why has he lost interest in you? Why is he backing away?
Maybe you’ve done nothing wrong! It could be just the opposite in which your man was pursuing you, and sharing your mutual excitement and tenderness. Suddenly he may realize that he is becoming more deeply attracted to you. For some men, fear of rejection, intimacy, losing one’s freedom, and feeling they can’t truly satisfy you in the long run, can cause men to run away from the woman of their dreams.
Is there a pattern that you notice where the chemistry is so right, you talk way into the night…eager savoring each other’s words and wanting so much to know about the person next to you? If you are being repeatedly rejected, your own self-inventory of possible problems may provide some clues to unfulfilled relationships.
- Do you find yourself attracting the same type of man over and over who can’t seem to commit?
- Do you find that after an argument or conflict, he backs away?
- Does your man seem to pull away whenever you get too close such as knowing too much about his emotions or pressing him to be more emotionally open or affectionate than what he naturally demonstrates?
- Do you have difficulty trusting him?
- Do you question decisions he makes?
- Do you find yourself criticizing your man after a certain “honeymoon” period in your relationship?
- Do you ask him for reassurances of affection and love?
- Do you push too hard and too fast for a commitment?
Although you cannot control another person, you can definitely impact the depth and quality of a relationship.
When your man backs away, state clearly your desire to have a truthful and authentic conversation about what is happening to him.- Once you’ve tried contacting him to openly communicate, then you need to wait for his response. Nothing will drive away a man faster or further away then a deluge of text messages, voicemails, and emails, each with greater confusion, urgency, and despondency.
- Don’t isolate yourself. This will only add to your misery. Instead allow yourself to be with your closest friends and family to talk and cry, letting out your feelings.
- Don’t go out to find another man to immediately replace the “one who got away!” You’ll come across as insecure, desperate, and uncaring and attract those who “dump you.” Instead take time to heal yourself, knowing that the healthier and more stable you are, the more attractive you are to your man and others.
- Resist the urge to badmouth your former man. Otherwise, you are the one who looks bad and undesirable. Instead, allow yourself to be neutral and nonjudgmental, that your man is handling the situation in the way that he needs to.
- After you’ve shared your painful feelings with friends and family, when you’re around them, be in the present moment and enjoy their company and be an active participant.
- If you need to let out your feelings, write down your specific thoughts, feelings, and experiences. You can return to as other thoughts, feelings, sensations, and memories come to mind.
Remind yourself often that you deserve the best partner who is open, truthful, honest, faithful, loving, treats you with kindness and compassion, and understands and supports your feelings.- Allow time to let go of your grief, disappointment, sadness, and hurt. Engage in activities that boost you physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually such as having fun with friends, seeking strength and purpose from God or Source, or taking on new interests or hobbies to interact with new people.
- Affirm that you are love and that you attract love!
When a man can examine and pursue his own desires and goals, and if he deeply cares for you, he will return even more grateful of the woman you are. Your radiant inner beauty is enough to keep and attract a man forever.